October 12, 2006
August 10, 2006
Welcome Mom!
My mother is coming to visit me from Japan this weekend. Although she is 66, this is her first visit abroad. So she is very excited to see America, where her precious daughter lives. She is preparing gifts for me. I said, "You don't have to bring any Japanese foods, because I can buy anything in the Japanese supermarket in Los Angeles". But her suitcase has been filled with Japanese foods such as NORI (Seaweed), UMEBOSHI (pickled plum), some WASABI tubes, SENBEI (rice cracker), YOKAN (sweet bean jelly), and other things. Also, she said she put some moral education books which she wants me to read. I think I am adult, but to her I am still a child. I appreciate that she has chosen to visit me, now. I think it is a big decision for her. The last time I saw her is one year ago. We can not see each other very often, so I am planning to take her wonderful places to make good memories for us.
When I told my friends, that my mother is coming, they told me to pop in on them. My neighbor, Junk san and her husband invited us their BBQ party. I guess my mother will be surprised to see such a big piece of beef. Not only beef, but also will she be surprised by big refrigerators and everything else big in a big American house. The images of America in my mother's mind are of huge and crime-infested cities. However, because of my friends' help, my mother will understand where I am living is beautiful and peaceful with kind neighbors.
My friends have shown me nice places in Los Angeles and its suburbs. They have been good experiences to learn about the city. Although I have lived here for a year, I have only gone to and from school everyday. I haven't known there are such beautiful places near by my home. I visited Lotusland (http://lotusland.org ), Holly Hock house (http://www.hollyhockhouse.net/), the Botanical Garden in San Diego, Crystal Cove, Marina Del Ray, and beautiful beaches. Another enjoyment is the variety of available foods. There are thousands of great restaurants in Los Angeles. Usually, dishes in America are bigger and more reasonable than in Japan. I guess she will be astonished to see such big meals!
My mother is coming this Saturday and I am ready for it. I booked fancy
hotels for her and I got detailed maps from AAA. I am really grateful that she and
I will be able to share such sweet moments in Los Angeles.
Meet Japan Lady.com
Marriage Introduction Service for Professional American Men
http://meetjapanlady.com
When I told my friends, that my mother is coming, they told me to pop in on them. My neighbor, Junk san and her husband invited us their BBQ party. I guess my mother will be surprised to see such a big piece of beef. Not only beef, but also will she be surprised by big refrigerators and everything else big in a big American house. The images of America in my mother's mind are of huge and crime-infested cities. However, because of my friends' help, my mother will understand where I am living is beautiful and peaceful with kind neighbors.
My friends have shown me nice places in Los Angeles and its suburbs. They have been good experiences to learn about the city. Although I have lived here for a year, I have only gone to and from school everyday. I haven't known there are such beautiful places near by my home. I visited Lotusland (http://lotusland.org ), Holly Hock house (http://www.hollyhockhouse.net/), the Botanical Garden in San Diego, Crystal Cove, Marina Del Ray, and beautiful beaches. Another enjoyment is the variety of available foods. There are thousands of great restaurants in Los Angeles. Usually, dishes in America are bigger and more reasonable than in Japan. I guess she will be astonished to see such big meals!
My mother is coming this Saturday and I am ready for it. I booked fancy
hotels for her and I got detailed maps from AAA. I am really grateful that she and
I will be able to share such sweet moments in Los Angeles.
Meet Japan Lady.com
Marriage Introduction Service for Professional American Men
http://meetjapanlady.com
June 30, 2006
A Challenge after 40 Years!
I received a call from a male client.
He is 40 years old and works as a public servant.
He said that he is going back to school to become a lawyer.
He is thinking about selling his house and will move to another state.
I was very surprised.
In Japan, not many men in their 40’s think about restarting their life over.
A man changing his job is not a common case in Japan.
The society does not have a structure which is acceptable of people of all ages; especially, for people who want to start a second career.
Also, Japanese people prefer being stable than trying in different venues.
He said,
“America is a country where everyone’s dreams come true.”
I said,
“You can do it.”
Still, it is a big challenge.
But I believe he can do it.
I am proud of him to make such a big decision.
Meet Japan Lady.com
Marriage Introduction Service for Professional American Men
http://meetjapanlady.com
He is 40 years old and works as a public servant.
He said that he is going back to school to become a lawyer.
He is thinking about selling his house and will move to another state.
I was very surprised.
In Japan, not many men in their 40’s think about restarting their life over.
A man changing his job is not a common case in Japan.
The society does not have a structure which is acceptable of people of all ages; especially, for people who want to start a second career.
Also, Japanese people prefer being stable than trying in different venues.
He said,
“America is a country where everyone’s dreams come true.”
I said,
“You can do it.”
Still, it is a big challenge.
But I believe he can do it.
I am proud of him to make such a big decision.
Meet Japan Lady.com
Marriage Introduction Service for Professional American Men
http://meetjapanlady.com
May 21, 2006
Fighting Everyday
I believe Japanese people are quiet and peaceful, I am typical Japanese in this sense, but I am a fighter in the United States. The reason why I am fighting is because it is hard for me to convey to people what exactly I am thinking. I appreciate the great tolerance and warm consideration most Americans provide me. However, when I ask a questions, they usually can not understand what I mean.
It happens at a bank, dealing with payments related to credit cards, or asking how to use a computer accessory which I bought. Especially, when I call the customer service to ask something, I feel very stressful. I take time, maybe ten to fifteen minutes, to explain my problems. However, the person I talk with is not the right person to talk to. Often, I am forwarded to another section, and I have to explain from the beginning again. At first, I try to be VERY friendly, but gradually, I become upset, and then they get upset, too. Struggling, I have to continue this conversation until I get a result. Sometimes, a customer service suddenly and probably on purpose cut off the line when he/she gives up to listening to me. I wish I could speak English fluently. I feel so sad, but I take this as practice for me to improve my English.
About two weeks ago, I had a terrible toothache. I called a dentist whom I heard charges reasonably for patients who are without insurance. (Actually, I worried about how much I need to pay for just treating one tooth since I heard medical fee in America is incredibly expensive. The receptionist who talked with me sounded kind. She said I need to visit the clinic first to fill out an application form, and then they could talk about making an appointment. I said, since I live far from the clinic (about one hour), I’d rather do it over the phone. (It is not a good idea to visit the clinic just for application.)Then she said she would send me an application form by mail and advised me to send it back as soon as I fill it out. I am glad because this is one of the rare successful conversation cases that I had experienced. Two hours later, a strong pain came back, so I called the dentist again. I had the chance to talk with the lady whom I talked previously, and I asked about the “emergency case.” She answered they accept only three patients a day from 7:30am, but they can not accept me if I would be the fourth patient. OK, I understand although I don’t think it is called emergency if there is no guarantee for patient to have a chance to see the dentist. I didn’t want to bet, so I gave up going there as an emergency. Additionally, I tried to ask some to get information about the clinic, but she sounded like she was tired of listening to my poor English; she did not sound friendly any longer. About a week has passed, but I haven’t received the application form from the clinic yet. I am not sure whether she remembers the promise she made, or not. I am not sure if we misunderstood each other. I am hesitant to call her again and ask about the application because I do not want to spend too much energy to fight. So I will continue to take “ADVIL” to reduce pain until I will go see my dentist in Tokyo next February.
Living in America is not easy for foreigners. I cry and struggle everyday. I fight everyday to survive in this country. Fighting everyday helps me to become better adapted to the environment. I know it will take some time to become fully adapted, but I truly feel that I will someday make it
It happens at a bank, dealing with payments related to credit cards, or asking how to use a computer accessory which I bought. Especially, when I call the customer service to ask something, I feel very stressful. I take time, maybe ten to fifteen minutes, to explain my problems. However, the person I talk with is not the right person to talk to. Often, I am forwarded to another section, and I have to explain from the beginning again. At first, I try to be VERY friendly, but gradually, I become upset, and then they get upset, too. Struggling, I have to continue this conversation until I get a result. Sometimes, a customer service suddenly and probably on purpose cut off the line when he/she gives up to listening to me. I wish I could speak English fluently. I feel so sad, but I take this as practice for me to improve my English.
About two weeks ago, I had a terrible toothache. I called a dentist whom I heard charges reasonably for patients who are without insurance. (Actually, I worried about how much I need to pay for just treating one tooth since I heard medical fee in America is incredibly expensive. The receptionist who talked with me sounded kind. She said I need to visit the clinic first to fill out an application form, and then they could talk about making an appointment. I said, since I live far from the clinic (about one hour), I’d rather do it over the phone. (It is not a good idea to visit the clinic just for application.)Then she said she would send me an application form by mail and advised me to send it back as soon as I fill it out. I am glad because this is one of the rare successful conversation cases that I had experienced. Two hours later, a strong pain came back, so I called the dentist again. I had the chance to talk with the lady whom I talked previously, and I asked about the “emergency case.” She answered they accept only three patients a day from 7:30am, but they can not accept me if I would be the fourth patient. OK, I understand although I don’t think it is called emergency if there is no guarantee for patient to have a chance to see the dentist. I didn’t want to bet, so I gave up going there as an emergency. Additionally, I tried to ask some to get information about the clinic, but she sounded like she was tired of listening to my poor English; she did not sound friendly any longer. About a week has passed, but I haven’t received the application form from the clinic yet. I am not sure whether she remembers the promise she made, or not. I am not sure if we misunderstood each other. I am hesitant to call her again and ask about the application because I do not want to spend too much energy to fight. So I will continue to take “ADVIL” to reduce pain until I will go see my dentist in Tokyo next February.
Living in America is not easy for foreigners. I cry and struggle everyday. I fight everyday to survive in this country. Fighting everyday helps me to become better adapted to the environment. I know it will take some time to become fully adapted, but I truly feel that I will someday make it
April 14, 2006
Why Living in America is Better than Living in Japan
One of our male clients asked me why I think living in America is better than living in Japan. One big reason is that I can live in America without suffering the daily crush and rush of being on Japan's rail and subway system. Since cars are the normal form of transportation in the USA, I do not have to get on a train every day to get to work, go shopping or to be out with friends and associates for a social event. Actually, most American people can never imagine how terrible the rush hour in Tokyo is; it is like a low-grade, temporary hell that all have to endure until they get to their particular destination. Every compartment of trains has more than 200 percent of occupancy and there are many station attendants at each door whose job it is to push people like so many varicose veins are pushed into a tight, stiff sock. Since most people naturally seek comfort, they push, kick and grab other people in order to gain any sitting or preferable standing position to that of other people. I once saw a man forcefully push his hand into a window resulting in a bloody hand. One of my sister's classmates fell down in the crowded steps at a station and then passed away. She was only 17 years old. It was sad accident, but she should not have had to die. On the other hand, some people (many people?) who want to commit suicide choose a station to for their final act. When those people jump in front of a morning train, the digital diagrams of a train schedule has to be modified thus further panicking commuters in a heightened chaotic situation. (The suicide rate in Japan is higher than in any other developed country: more than Japanese 30,000 people die annually from their final, high- profile acts this providing less hope to other Japanese people in their own lives.) Inside of a typical train, people are supposed to stand facing and hugging strangers whom they don't know for about 30 to 60 minutes - or more. Standing face to face in such tightly packed compartments can be claustrophobic and lead to breathing problems. If it is a humid summer day, or wet rainy day of June, the rooms are like a steam sauna. The morning train is better than the evening train because there are markedly less drunks in the early AM compared to after 10 PM when salary-men and party-goers are usually in transit. The whole compartment can start to smell of liquor and some drunks even start to fight each other and vomit in the train. Sometimes even murder cases happen in this kind of situation, so the life inside of the trains of Japan in the 21st century can be dangerous. It is disgusting especially for ladies because sometimes (many times) ladies become a victim of lewd, kinky men in a locked container. It is especially a serious social problem in central Tokyo; recently, some train companies have started to provide a women-only compartment in morning and evening rush-hours to protect women from the unwanted advances of such impulsive and criminal behavior. (Please see the pictures) I myself was tired of such stressful life in Tokyo; actually I lived in a very central in Tokyo in order not to use trains every day. Fortunately, I haven't experienced using trains since I came to the USA. I enjoy my 20 minutes walk to school every morning and evening. I can feel the seasonal wind and breathe fresh air under the sunshine. I can see the singing birds, wild rabbits and squirrels, snails and ants, greens and flowers, and a lot of natural creatures which make up the beautiful living environment. In this way, I feel more connected to the wonders of earth. I appreciate that I live in America now. This is one of the reasons that I think living in America is better than living in Japan.
March 13, 2006
Hello Baby!
"I had a baby!" A former KAIWA client in Hawaii recently gave us the exciting news. I am happy to hear that both she and a girl are doing well. In Japan, where the healthcare is nationalized, it is usual for a mother and a child to stay in a hospital for about a week. But in America the healthcare is private, so unless there are medical complications, the mother and child are released from a hospital as soon as possible. Is it enough time for them both to gain their strength? She said that her mother recently came from Japan to Hawaii to help her awhile. In addition, her husband took one month paternity leave holiday to help her. How nice to read this! In Japan this would be impossible not only because corporate Japan would not allow a man to take so much time off but also because in Japanese culture it is believed that raising children is a women's business and that Japanese men are so detached from things in the home that they would not be very helpful for children's matter. This is another one of the reasons that Japanese ladies want to meet American men instead of Japanese men.February 11, 2006
NABE
February is the coldest season in Japan and it snows even in Tokyo. (It is more than 80 degrees, today, in LA though!) In a cold winter day, we like to have a warm family dinner called "NABE". Although SUSHI is known as one the most popular Japanese cuisines, I would like you to try NABE, if you have chance.
What is NABE? There are a lot of NABE types in Japan. Each rural area has its only variety of NABE, and each family has its own taste. Some people try to arrange their own tastes, such as Korean kimchi taste, Indian Curry taste, or any other ethnic spicy taste. It is easy to cook NABE. Look into the refrigerator and find some leftover vegetables before you go shopping at Costco. My mother cooks NABE when she wants to clean out the refrigerator. Be ready for a portable gas table and put it at the center of the dining table where your family members gather. Also you need a big pan; we call it NABE made of stainless steel or ceramic. Make DASHI (your favorite soup) and pour it into the pan (NABE). Chop the vegetables and add to the pan. You can add meat or fish, shiitake, SHIMEJI or MAITAKE mushrooms, TOFU, processed fish of KAMABOKO or HAMPEN, and anything else you like. Shake (Salmon), Tara (Cod), FUGU (Blow fish) are good for NABE, also beef or chicken are nice. NABE is one of the most balanced nutritional cuisines in 
Japan. Sumo wrestlers eat special NABE called "CHANKO NABE" everyday. When you visit Tokyo, you can eat real “CHANKO NABE” at “CHANKO NABE” restaurant which is owned by a sumo wrestler. SUKIYAKI is a well known NABE, and it is my favorite. In winter, my mother cooks NABE at least two times a week because of its ease, its reasonable cost, and family warmth. It is all family's pleasure, and we value the moments sharing the NABE dinner. So I love NABE! Yummy! I used to have NABE parties with friends, when I was in TOKYO. Drinking wine, eating NABE with compatible guys, we had nice times. I brought my special pan and portable magnetism table for NABE when I came back from Japan last summer. Unfortunately, I haven't had any chance to use it yet. I don't think eating NABE, by myself, is too enjoyable. I dream of having my own precious family who can share the cold winter with. We'll be eating OISHII warm NABE dinner one day in the future.
What is NABE? There are a lot of NABE types in Japan. Each rural area has its only variety of NABE, and each family has its own taste. Some people try to arrange their own tastes, such as Korean kimchi taste, Indian Curry taste, or any other ethnic spicy taste. It is easy to cook NABE. Look into the refrigerator and find some leftover vegetables before you go shopping at Costco. My mother cooks NABE when she wants to clean out the refrigerator. Be ready for a portable gas table and put it at the center of the dining table where your family members gather. Also you need a big pan; we call it NABE made of stainless steel or ceramic. Make DASHI (your favorite soup) and pour it into the pan (NABE). Chop the vegetables and add to the pan. You can add meat or fish, shiitake, SHIMEJI or MAITAKE mushrooms, TOFU, processed fish of KAMABOKO or HAMPEN, and anything else you like. Shake (Salmon), Tara (Cod), FUGU (Blow fish) are good for NABE, also beef or chicken are nice. NABE is one of the most balanced nutritional cuisines in 
Japan. Sumo wrestlers eat special NABE called "CHANKO NABE" everyday. When you visit Tokyo, you can eat real “CHANKO NABE” at “CHANKO NABE” restaurant which is owned by a sumo wrestler. SUKIYAKI is a well known NABE, and it is my favorite. In winter, my mother cooks NABE at least two times a week because of its ease, its reasonable cost, and family warmth. It is all family's pleasure, and we value the moments sharing the NABE dinner. So I love NABE! Yummy! I used to have NABE parties with friends, when I was in TOKYO. Drinking wine, eating NABE with compatible guys, we had nice times. I brought my special pan and portable magnetism table for NABE when I came back from Japan last summer. Unfortunately, I haven't had any chance to use it yet. I don't think eating NABE, by myself, is too enjoyable. I dream of having my own precious family who can share the cold winter with. We'll be eating OISHII warm NABE dinner one day in the future.
January 22, 2006
"Tatsu Tori Ato wo Nigosazu"
"When do you know you are really Japanese?"
I asked this of my Japanese friend in America.
She answered.
"Whenever I pick my hair from the drain, after showering and clean up the bath room for anyone who is going to use it next, I feel that I am really Japanese. Even staying in a hotel, and knowing a maid is going to clean up my room, I feel like I am not supposed to leave a mess."
I agree with her thought.
I often see the business class seats incredibly messy after a long flight.
I wonder who, how, and why it should be so chaotic.
In the both cases, staying in a hotel or an airplane, you might say,
"Since I have paid for my room, I can use it as I like."
Of course, you can,
but if you are a well educated Japanese, you might say,
"What a shame!"
We have a proverb in Japan.
"Tatsu Tori Ato wo Nigosazu" --- (Japanese)
The direct meaning is that migrant birds never leave garbage when they leave.
So, it means
"Clean up before you leave."
My parents always taught me to think about the person who comes next,
so I want them to feel comfortable.
I appreciate that I could learn that sense of morality from my parents.
Perhaps myfriend was taught the same thing from her parents with the old Japanese saying.
As I was wiping off the table, after the chatting in a STARBACKS COFFEE,
she looked at me and laughed,
"You are a very Japanese!"
"OK, I am Japanese."
" I feel happy to know someone is going to sit here and enjoy a cup of coffee comfortably ."
I asked this of my Japanese friend in America.
She answered.
"Whenever I pick my hair from the drain, after showering and clean up the bath room for anyone who is going to use it next, I feel that I am really Japanese. Even staying in a hotel, and knowing a maid is going to clean up my room, I feel like I am not supposed to leave a mess."
I agree with her thought.
I often see the business class seats incredibly messy after a long flight.
I wonder who, how, and why it should be so chaotic.
In the both cases, staying in a hotel or an airplane, you might say,
"Since I have paid for my room, I can use it as I like."
Of course, you can,
but if you are a well educated Japanese, you might say,
"What a shame!"
We have a proverb in Japan.
"Tatsu Tori Ato wo Nigosazu" --- (Japanese)
The direct meaning is that migrant birds never leave garbage when they leave.
So, it means
"Clean up before you leave."
My parents always taught me to think about the person who comes next,
so I want them to feel comfortable.
I appreciate that I could learn that sense of morality from my parents.
Perhaps myfriend was taught the same thing from her parents with the old Japanese saying.
As I was wiping off the table, after the chatting in a STARBACKS COFFEE,
she looked at me and laughed,
"You are a very Japanese!"
"OK, I am Japanese."
" I feel happy to know someone is going to sit here and enjoy a cup of coffee comfortably ."
January 08, 2006
New Year Resolution in 2006
Akemashite Omedeto Gozaimasu!
KOTOSHIMO YOROSHIKU ONEGAI SHIMASU.
Happy New Year!
I spent a wonderful New Year holiday in Las Vegas, mysecond home town. I went to movies, shows, buffets,and Zion National Park with my friend, during the holidays. Actually, I got fat because I ate so much!
I don't know why, but no matter where I am in a noisy crowded road in Las Vegas or in a vast backdrop ofnature, I feel I am alone. However, I am sure I feel something different from the moment when I was inTokyo even though it is the same situation as I am alone now. I feel more confident, I feel more independent, and I feel more energetic because I can make sure that I came to the USA to make my dreams come true.
"What will you do differently in 2006?"
I was asked a New Years resolution.
My friend said,
"Iam going on a diet this year"
while eating a big cup of ice cream.
"Maybe I will start next week."
Everything I experience everyday in America is very exciting for me, so I would like to experience something fun more and more. I would like to meet new people, learn more about America, and share a good time with them. This is my New Years Resolution.
During holidays, I watched "Sex and the City."
Usually, I do not watch it because I have thought that it is a silly TV program, but I was just curious about the American way of love life. I learned American ladies try as many man as they possible. They continue trying the next love even if they fail. They never give up trying to find true love. How tough they are!
If I am in America for a long time, will I be able to become like an American lady?
No, no, no.
As I am a traditional Japanese lady, I would like to keep "YAMATONADESHIKO soul" with me for good.
However,
I think I have to be much stronger like Americanladies.
I add this as my New Years Resolution!
KOTOSHIMO YOROSHIKU ONEGAI SHIMASU.
Happy New Year!
I spent a wonderful New Year holiday in Las Vegas, mysecond home town. I went to movies, shows, buffets,and Zion National Park with my friend, during the holidays. Actually, I got fat because I ate so much!
I don't know why, but no matter where I am in a noisy crowded road in Las Vegas or in a vast backdrop ofnature, I feel I am alone. However, I am sure I feel something different from the moment when I was inTokyo even though it is the same situation as I am alone now. I feel more confident, I feel more independent, and I feel more energetic because I can make sure that I came to the USA to make my dreams come true.
"What will you do differently in 2006?"
I was asked a New Years resolution.
My friend said,
"Iam going on a diet this year"
while eating a big cup of ice cream.
"Maybe I will start next week."
Everything I experience everyday in America is very exciting for me, so I would like to experience something fun more and more. I would like to meet new people, learn more about America, and share a good time with them. This is my New Years Resolution.
During holidays, I watched "Sex and the City."
Usually, I do not watch it because I have thought that it is a silly TV program, but I was just curious about the American way of love life. I learned American ladies try as many man as they possible. They continue trying the next love even if they fail. They never give up trying to find true love. How tough they are!
If I am in America for a long time, will I be able to become like an American lady?
No, no, no.
As I am a traditional Japanese lady, I would like to keep "YAMATONADESHIKO soul" with me for good.
However,
I think I have to be much stronger like Americanladies.
I add this as my New Years Resolution!
December 18, 2005
Busy Busy Busy?
Everybody says,
"Because I am busy."
I don't like this typical excuse, and I don't want you to say this phrase easily to the lady with whom you are corresponding, if seriously want to create a good relationship with her.
I am often asked by our lady members, who are exchanging email with men,
"He doesn't reply very often. Why?"
I don't know because I am not him, but I am supposed to answer her,
"Perhaps, he might be busy." Though, he might have the different reason.
A young lady started exchanging email with a man in NY. He was an attorney. As hewas a professional business man, it was true that he was very busy to exchange email very often.
But it was also true that he became a member of our service,because he was searching for someone to share a wonderful time with and hoped to make a difference in his BUSY life.
It was a nice beginning that both he and she enjoyed corresponding with through email.
Good conversation should be like a playing tennis. The ball should come and go continuously.
They got to know each other little by little, and their communication stance seemed trouble free. However, in the meantime, he gradually delayed the reply to her: he eventually was writing her only once every three weeks. Whenever he wrote to her, he always added the excuse,
"I am sorry, but I am busy."
Even though his behavior changed little bit colder, she expected to hear from him and kept friendly. She said,
"I can be patient because I understand he is busy, but if he isnot interested in me, I would like him to tell me so."
I asked him what happened, but he didn't think he was doing anything wrong.
He said,
"I am going to Japan tomeet her, in person, after finishing this project.Yes, I am positive."
Waiting for unanswered email fora long time must have been tough, but I was observing their relationship for a while. However, corresponding by email once every three weeks is not enough to create a good relationship. She gave up on him and decided to cancel her membership completely.
Actually, I don't know the meaning of his "I am busy." I am not sure if he really wanted to meet her, or he was really busy.
I know a lot of busy people.
For some people, "I am busy, SO I try to make time for something wonderful.",
but for some people, "I ambusy, SO I can not make time for something wonderful."
"YOU CAN" or "YOU CAN 'T", the reason is the same for both types of people.
It would rather be better to chose life with the person who can think positively. As a matter of fact, are there so many people who are busier than the US president? God gives each of us 24hours equally. Even though you are very busy, you have time to eat, you have time to go to the restroom, and your have time to sleep. I wondered if the attorney member could have just a five minutes talk a day with her. Perhaps, his sense of value for love life was totally different from hers.
As your New Year Resolution, I would suggest to all members,
"Less Busy, More Love!"
I hope your life in 2006 is going to be colorful!
"Because I am busy."
I don't like this typical excuse, and I don't want you to say this phrase easily to the lady with whom you are corresponding, if seriously want to create a good relationship with her.
I am often asked by our lady members, who are exchanging email with men,
"He doesn't reply very often. Why?"
I don't know because I am not him, but I am supposed to answer her,
"Perhaps, he might be busy." Though, he might have the different reason.
A young lady started exchanging email with a man in NY. He was an attorney. As hewas a professional business man, it was true that he was very busy to exchange email very often.
But it was also true that he became a member of our service,because he was searching for someone to share a wonderful time with and hoped to make a difference in his BUSY life.
It was a nice beginning that both he and she enjoyed corresponding with through email.
Good conversation should be like a playing tennis. The ball should come and go continuously.
They got to know each other little by little, and their communication stance seemed trouble free. However, in the meantime, he gradually delayed the reply to her: he eventually was writing her only once every three weeks. Whenever he wrote to her, he always added the excuse,
"I am sorry, but I am busy."
Even though his behavior changed little bit colder, she expected to hear from him and kept friendly. She said,
"I can be patient because I understand he is busy, but if he isnot interested in me, I would like him to tell me so."
I asked him what happened, but he didn't think he was doing anything wrong.
He said,
"I am going to Japan tomeet her, in person, after finishing this project.Yes, I am positive."
Waiting for unanswered email fora long time must have been tough, but I was observing their relationship for a while. However, corresponding by email once every three weeks is not enough to create a good relationship. She gave up on him and decided to cancel her membership completely.
Actually, I don't know the meaning of his "I am busy." I am not sure if he really wanted to meet her, or he was really busy.
I know a lot of busy people.
For some people, "I am busy, SO I try to make time for something wonderful.",
but for some people, "I ambusy, SO I can not make time for something wonderful."
"YOU CAN" or "YOU CAN 'T", the reason is the same for both types of people.
It would rather be better to chose life with the person who can think positively. As a matter of fact, are there so many people who are busier than the US president? God gives each of us 24hours equally. Even though you are very busy, you have time to eat, you have time to go to the restroom, and your have time to sleep. I wondered if the attorney member could have just a five minutes talk a day with her. Perhaps, his sense of value for love life was totally different from hers.
As your New Year Resolution, I would suggest to all members,
"Less Busy, More Love!"
I hope your life in 2006 is going to be colorful!
November 24, 2005
"It Is AUTOMATIC."
Another male member responded to his message. (Thank you!) I would also like to share that.
Konnichiwa Matsumoto-san,
I read the letter from the east coast male member, onyour female side blog. I agree with him 100%!!! It's absolutely amazing that one can write with one's heart and soul for weeks and weeks, and when the in-person meeting happens, and there is no connection, it's like you are two strangers with no intention of evermeeting, chatting, whatever, ever again.
It's very interesting to read that others have had the same experiences.
Peace,
(M.V.B.)
Both men and women are searching for the right person. Some people say it is easy, but some people say it is NOT easy. Since I am single, I don't know how I will when I find my soul mate. I don't even know what the judgment point is when I am sure he is really MY man.
"We are engaged"
I got the good news from two couples at the end of October. In both cases, they made quite quick decisions to achieve their goals. (Both couples met in early 2005.) I always ask our married female members.
"What made you decide to marry him?"
It is interesting, but all of them answered the same thing.
"It is AUTOMATIC."
It means that when she feels it might be true love, all things are going smoothly without trouble. It looks as if it is a magic. I can imagine it, but unfortunately, I have never had such a wonderful feeling with that special man yet. I enjoy supporting someone else in making miracles, at the same time, like many men and women, I dream of meeting that fateful man.
Konnichiwa Matsumoto-san,
I read the letter from the east coast male member, onyour female side blog. I agree with him 100%!!! It's absolutely amazing that one can write with one's heart and soul for weeks and weeks, and when the in-person meeting happens, and there is no connection, it's like you are two strangers with no intention of evermeeting, chatting, whatever, ever again.
It's very interesting to read that others have had the same experiences.
Peace,
(M.V.B.)
Both men and women are searching for the right person. Some people say it is easy, but some people say it is NOT easy. Since I am single, I don't know how I will when I find my soul mate. I don't even know what the judgment point is when I am sure he is really MY man.
"We are engaged"
I got the good news from two couples at the end of October. In both cases, they made quite quick decisions to achieve their goals. (Both couples met in early 2005.) I always ask our married female members.
"What made you decide to marry him?"
It is interesting, but all of them answered the same thing.
"It is AUTOMATIC."
It means that when she feels it might be true love, all things are going smoothly without trouble. It looks as if it is a magic. I can imagine it, but unfortunately, I have never had such a wonderful feeling with that special man yet. I enjoy supporting someone else in making miracles, at the same time, like many men and women, I dream of meeting that fateful man.
November 18, 2005
Have You Ever Had a Fateful Meeting?
I received a message from one of our male members. I enjoyed reading it, and I asked him if he didn't mind if I shared it on my blog. He said OK. (Thank you very much.) So, I would like to share his message with you. What do you think?
Hello Naoko,
I have a little bit of time so I can explain what I meant yesterday. In the past people met either directly, not knowing anything about each other, or being introduced by friends, matchmakers, etc. The first contact and the fresh impression was the most important for the connection. Then they dated in normal life and got to know each other as life goes. Now, with internet, everything is reversed. We meet and talk on the net, we know too much about other person before we meet. Women ask sometimes so deep question about current and past life, life and sexual experiences and preferences, financial and family status. We simply know too much about each other when we meet. We expect somebody else than whom we really meet! My experience now, after so many writings and few meetings, here and in Japan, is that it does not matter really what we write, it does matter what and how we do in real life during the meeting. This is so difficult experience. Specially for people with long past, families, responsibilities, etc.
What I think, that people living in close areas, should just make contact using internet and then try to meet right away, before they go into long description of their life. That's what I tried to do talking to women located here in Boston or in general in the East coast area. The drive to New York is just 4 hours. I can go and come back within one day. I never got any response, even from women living within Newton area! I do not understand why. We meet strangers all the time and we talk to them without hesitation, why there is such a big problem in meeting somebody whom we possibly can fall in love with? Maybe "match" service should set up a place where people who are interested can meet and mingle, at least almost local people. There were such, so called "flash" dates, sometimes ago, it was the best as everyone said. You talk for 1 minute with a person and you know if you want talk more. Than you talk in private. Or a small cheese and wine party that are sometimes organized by local matching services. In international dating it is more complicated of course. Somebody has to fly far away. It would be more beneficial if that person could meet two-three persons of the opposite sex during that time. Of course everybody would know that there are more than one meeting. Maybe then there would be no such tension and high expectations, that it is now or never. In a way webcam can be a replacement. But webcam is a dangerous thing in itself and people start getting involved into things they shouldn't before meeting in real life.... I do not want to do such things either. In one word I have no solution. Do you? But we have to try if we want to meet Japanese or Thai or Chinese lady and vice-versa, because I do not know how to find them here.
With best greetings, (M)
Hello Naoko,
I have a little bit of time so I can explain what I meant yesterday. In the past people met either directly, not knowing anything about each other, or being introduced by friends, matchmakers, etc. The first contact and the fresh impression was the most important for the connection. Then they dated in normal life and got to know each other as life goes. Now, with internet, everything is reversed. We meet and talk on the net, we know too much about other person before we meet. Women ask sometimes so deep question about current and past life, life and sexual experiences and preferences, financial and family status. We simply know too much about each other when we meet. We expect somebody else than whom we really meet! My experience now, after so many writings and few meetings, here and in Japan, is that it does not matter really what we write, it does matter what and how we do in real life during the meeting. This is so difficult experience. Specially for people with long past, families, responsibilities, etc.
What I think, that people living in close areas, should just make contact using internet and then try to meet right away, before they go into long description of their life. That's what I tried to do talking to women located here in Boston or in general in the East coast area. The drive to New York is just 4 hours. I can go and come back within one day. I never got any response, even from women living within Newton area! I do not understand why. We meet strangers all the time and we talk to them without hesitation, why there is such a big problem in meeting somebody whom we possibly can fall in love with? Maybe "match" service should set up a place where people who are interested can meet and mingle, at least almost local people. There were such, so called "flash" dates, sometimes ago, it was the best as everyone said. You talk for 1 minute with a person and you know if you want talk more. Than you talk in private. Or a small cheese and wine party that are sometimes organized by local matching services. In international dating it is more complicated of course. Somebody has to fly far away. It would be more beneficial if that person could meet two-three persons of the opposite sex during that time. Of course everybody would know that there are more than one meeting. Maybe then there would be no such tension and high expectations, that it is now or never. In a way webcam can be a replacement. But webcam is a dangerous thing in itself and people start getting involved into things they shouldn't before meeting in real life.... I do not want to do such things either. In one word I have no solution. Do you? But we have to try if we want to meet Japanese or Thai or Chinese lady and vice-versa, because I do not know how to find them here.
With best greetings, (M)
October 22, 2005
Hello Young and Beautiful Lady!
One of our male members, a 72 year old gentleman,visited the Tokyo office last January. He committed to finding a Japanese wife very soon, so he reserved a hotel suite room, in Tokyo, for a four month stay. He had studied Japanese language and culture with a tutor, enjoyed Japanese life and been waiting for the chance to meet a nice Japanese lady. Originally, in email, he opened his emails with: "Hello, young and beautiful, Naoko." I felt embarrassed, yet gleefully smiled. Since no Japanese man gives ladies such flattering words, Japanese ladies are not used to it. However, no lady is upset to hear it. I like this kind of American greeting culture, even though he doesn't necessarily think I am young and beautiful.
When I met him at the Shinjuku Hilton, last July, he was already with his charming lady, aged 44.
Of course, when we made an appointment, by phone, he said
"Hello, how are you young and beautiful, Naoko?",
and when we met in the hotel lobby, he smiled me and said
"Welcome, young and beautiful Naoko!"
I am glad his dream came true because he actively and repeatedly voiced his desire.
His lady told me that she was so happy when she had heard his words
"Hello, young andbeautiful..."
at their first meeting, but she saw that he gave these words to all ladies, wherever they met, including waitresses. She said,
"I wanted him to say those words only to me!"
She felt a little bit disappointed, but she knew it is just a part of hiswarm hearted personality. Anyway, together they looked so happy. She came to Los Angeles this summer, and started a new life with him. They enjoy traveling all over the world together, now.
While traveling, he might say
"Hello young and beautiful..."
whenever he encounters a lady.
Whenever I talk withwith him, I say
"Hi, young and handsome....",
by the way...
When I met him at the Shinjuku Hilton, last July, he was already with his charming lady, aged 44.
Of course, when we made an appointment, by phone, he said
"Hello, how are you young and beautiful, Naoko?",
and when we met in the hotel lobby, he smiled me and said
"Welcome, young and beautiful Naoko!"
I am glad his dream came true because he actively and repeatedly voiced his desire.
His lady told me that she was so happy when she had heard his words
"Hello, young andbeautiful..."
at their first meeting, but she saw that he gave these words to all ladies, wherever they met, including waitresses. She said,
"I wanted him to say those words only to me!"
She felt a little bit disappointed, but she knew it is just a part of hiswarm hearted personality. Anyway, together they looked so happy. She came to Los Angeles this summer, and started a new life with him. They enjoy traveling all over the world together, now.
While traveling, he might say
"Hello young and beautiful..."
whenever he encounters a lady.
Whenever I talk withwith him, I say
"Hi, young and handsome....",
by the way...
October 12, 2005
Real American Food?
Mariko, who has a son from her ex-husband, remarriedto a Japanese American in Hawaii. Wednesday, she visited me, in Los Angeles, with her husband and son. They were so excited because they were coming from Hawaii to the MAINLAND as a MECCA. For me, however, Hawaii is the special place! They planned playing at Disneyland, shopping at TARGET, and eating at REDROBIN. Disneyland, TARGET, and RED ROBIN are not in Hawaii, so they can not miss it. Before they traveled, I asked Mariko what she wanted to eat for dinner.
She answered "RED ROBIN!" http://www.redrobin.com/flash.html
I said "Eeehhhhh!! Are you sure? "
In Los Angeles, there are various kinds of fancy restaurants serving Japanese food, Thai food, Indianfood, Korean food, Vietnamese food, Italian food and others. So, I thought eating at RED ROBIN does not sound very exciting.
She said "Yes! There is no RED ROBIN in Hawaii, so we love to go and eat RED ROBIN hamburgers!"
I said "OK, whatever you like!"
We decided to visit RED ROBIN for dinner.
Come to think of it, I have never experienced eating real Americanfood. Whenever I eat out, my American friend never takes me to American food restaurants, so I don't know what American food is, actually. It was a good chance to experience American food. She ordered a mushroom hamburger with French fries for her husband and me, a dish of macaroni and cheese for her son, and a blue cheese hamburger for herself. Drinks were, of course, Coke. But I ordered iced tea instead . Whenever I see American people eating sushi with Coke, I think it is mismatch: a cup of hot, green tea must be the best with sushi! Likewise, I think Coke must be the best match with American food; however, I can not drink Coke, because my mother prohibited drinking Coke when I was a child. My mother always told me Coke melts your bones. Is it true?
Anyway, the hamburger was very big and juicy. The French fries were thick.
"WOW! It is a real American food, isn't it?"
I am glad that I could experience it. I enjoyed sharing time with Mariko's family. Some extra good news is that they are going to have a baby next year. I am happy because sometimes happy couples come to visit and share their happiness with me.
So, I am proud of my job!
She answered "RED ROBIN!" http://www.redrobin.com/flash.html
I said "Eeehhhhh!! Are you sure? "
In Los Angeles, there are various kinds of fancy restaurants serving Japanese food, Thai food, Indianfood, Korean food, Vietnamese food, Italian food and others. So, I thought eating at RED ROBIN does not sound very exciting.
She said "Yes! There is no RED ROBIN in Hawaii, so we love to go and eat RED ROBIN hamburgers!"
I said "OK, whatever you like!"
We decided to visit RED ROBIN for dinner.
Come to think of it, I have never experienced eating real Americanfood. Whenever I eat out, my American friend never takes me to American food restaurants, so I don't know what American food is, actually. It was a good chance to experience American food. She ordered a mushroom hamburger with French fries for her husband and me, a dish of macaroni and cheese for her son, and a blue cheese hamburger for herself. Drinks were, of course, Coke. But I ordered iced tea instead . Whenever I see American people eating sushi with Coke, I think it is mismatch: a cup of hot, green tea must be the best with sushi! Likewise, I think Coke must be the best match with American food; however, I can not drink Coke, because my mother prohibited drinking Coke when I was a child. My mother always told me Coke melts your bones. Is it true?
Anyway, the hamburger was very big and juicy. The French fries were thick.
"WOW! It is a real American food, isn't it?"
I am glad that I could experience it. I enjoyed sharing time with Mariko's family. Some extra good news is that they are going to have a baby next year. I am happy because sometimes happy couples come to visit and share their happiness with me.
So, I am proud of my job!
September 21, 2005
The life with a Dog II
After writing about dogs, some readers shared their opinions. "Yes, it is true, dogs are innocent and dogs never betray you." I think everybody wants to be loved as dogs love you, because it is true love. You might find the comparison unusual, but sometimes a lady wants you to love her more than you love your dogs and cats.
One of lady members visited her man, whom she met through our service after six months corresponding and meeting in Japan. She wanted to experience more time with him, so she quit her job and planned to stay with him for about four weeks. I think living together as a trial is a good opportunity to learn more about each other before getting married, even though it is just a short time.
After she returned to Japan, I asked her how she liked it. She told me her story about staying with him. Sharing time together, she discovered his living style that she had never known. She learned such things as habits, favorite things, disliked things and many other things because she could see him from the different point of view in daily life. She felt more affection when she knew he took care of his dogs and cats with fondness. She was sure that he would love her as he cared for his pets. However, she was surprised that he put the human dishes and pet dishes into the dish washer together and he put her panties into the washing machine with the pet's dirty fabrics. He had never thought twice to do it because dogs and cats were more than a family for him. Although she had never lived with dogs and cats in her house in Japan, it was an incredible experience for her. She said to herself that she didn't want him to do it....
I am not sure if it was the reason, but they didn't choose to get married, finally.
I would say to all of pet loving men: ask a lady if her panties could be washed with pet's belongings, before putting them into the washing machine. This is what I learned from her story.
September 05, 2005
The Life with a Dog
My dog, GIZMO, always welcome me with innocent eyes. When I feel lonely, he heals me, he hugs me, and heal ways kisses me. Though he can not speak English, and I can not speak English very well, we get along without any words. I am very happy that I can live with a dog.
When I lived in Tokyo, I never thought I could have a dog at home. My Shinjuku apartment was too tiny for any pets. It was about 30 square meters (I can not count with feet), but still the rent was about 1000 dollars a month. I only got sunshine a few moment before noon, because the sun then hides behind the tall buildings. I missed the sunshine everyday. There were a small kitchen, a bathroom and some cabinets which can satisfy a single person's simple lifestyle. As I left home early in the morning and got back late at night, the room was only a place for sleeping. Feeling oppressed, I didn't usually close the door when I used bathroom. I didn't care because nobody, except me, was there. The bed could be changed to a sofa when a guest visited. However, I could not invite guests home very often. Everything was compact, so I could complete my daily chores without over urdening myself, in the room. I knew I could not have a dog in Tokyo because of the bad living environment. However, I have been dreaming of the life with a dog for a long time.
After coming to the USA, I saw many families living with pets. Both the people and their pets look happy, because there is the satisfaction of love within a family. GIZMO and I have lived together, since I moved to Los Angeles, and I really enjoy playing with GIZMO. The more I give him love, the more he answers me with love. Animals never betray their people, so I can trust him. I really like life with a dog now in LA.
When I lived in Tokyo, I never thought I could have a dog at home. My Shinjuku apartment was too tiny for any pets. It was about 30 square meters (I can not count with feet), but still the rent was about 1000 dollars a month. I only got sunshine a few moment before noon, because the sun then hides behind the tall buildings. I missed the sunshine everyday. There were a small kitchen, a bathroom and some cabinets which can satisfy a single person's simple lifestyle. As I left home early in the morning and got back late at night, the room was only a place for sleeping. Feeling oppressed, I didn't usually close the door when I used bathroom. I didn't care because nobody, except me, was there. The bed could be changed to a sofa when a guest visited. However, I could not invite guests home very often. Everything was compact, so I could complete my daily chores without over urdening myself, in the room. I knew I could not have a dog in Tokyo because of the bad living environment. However, I have been dreaming of the life with a dog for a long time.
After coming to the USA, I saw many families living with pets. Both the people and their pets look happy, because there is the satisfaction of love within a family. GIZMO and I have lived together, since I moved to Los Angeles, and I really enjoy playing with GIZMO. The more I give him love, the more he answers me with love. Animals never betray their people, so I can trust him. I really like life with a dog now in LA.
August 17, 2005
What America Gives Me
Is America a better place for me to live than mynative land? When asked, I strongly agreed. One of my reasons is that America gives everyone many chances without distinctions for age or gender. Additionally, people can try whatever they wish. American people trust their own ability, and the people around them also trust them and support them if they have ambitions. It must be from the frontier spirit. I like this American challenge spirit.
In Japan, it might be uncomfortable to be at work if you are a single woman over age 30. She can not be elevated to a betterposition even though she is more experienced than her male colleagues. There is absolutely discrimination between men and women, and young and old. When I first saw a woman over 60 working at WAL-MART, I was very encouraged. She looked very energetic for her age.
For me, it was also uncomfortable at home with my family. They always asked me if I have a boyfriend, when I would get married, and when they could see their grand children.This was not only with my close family, but also my extended family. When I found that my parents were secretly planning to have me to meet a single man for an arranged marriage, I felt big pressure. They are not concerned about my feelings, they are concerned about the public image. In Japan, at home and work,there was no place I could relax. So I came to America to find my comfortable place.
Another reasonis that America gives me whatever opportunity I wish. When I try to do something new in America, people around me always encourage me to challenge it with the words "YOU CAN TRY.", "YOU CAN DO IT." Compare this to, when I try to do something new in Japan, people around me always share negative remarks like "It is too difficult to do it.", "You are too old.", "You should reconsider." I believe I am a unique person. I want to try something different from anyone. But in Japan, you should be average, you should be conservative and you should keep the rules which were defined by old people. To be unique means to be crazy.The people in young generations try to change the Japanese society, though it is still too difficult. It is necessary for Japan to improve with new methods which the young have to be capable in global competition.
Accordingly, I have been feeling very comfortable since I came to America. America gives me a lot of opportunities. I am trying to create my new life with encouragement from many American people. So,America is better for me than Japan.
In Japan, it might be uncomfortable to be at work if you are a single woman over age 30. She can not be elevated to a betterposition even though she is more experienced than her male colleagues. There is absolutely discrimination between men and women, and young and old. When I first saw a woman over 60 working at WAL-MART, I was very encouraged. She looked very energetic for her age.
For me, it was also uncomfortable at home with my family. They always asked me if I have a boyfriend, when I would get married, and when they could see their grand children.This was not only with my close family, but also my extended family. When I found that my parents were secretly planning to have me to meet a single man for an arranged marriage, I felt big pressure. They are not concerned about my feelings, they are concerned about the public image. In Japan, at home and work,there was no place I could relax. So I came to America to find my comfortable place.
Another reasonis that America gives me whatever opportunity I wish. When I try to do something new in America, people around me always encourage me to challenge it with the words "YOU CAN TRY.", "YOU CAN DO IT." Compare this to, when I try to do something new in Japan, people around me always share negative remarks like "It is too difficult to do it.", "You are too old.", "You should reconsider." I believe I am a unique person. I want to try something different from anyone. But in Japan, you should be average, you should be conservative and you should keep the rules which were defined by old people. To be unique means to be crazy.The people in young generations try to change the Japanese society, though it is still too difficult. It is necessary for Japan to improve with new methods which the young have to be capable in global competition.
Accordingly, I have been feeling very comfortable since I came to America. America gives me a lot of opportunities. I am trying to create my new life with encouragement from many American people. So,America is better for me than Japan.
July 31, 2005
JAPANESE CHICHI (father) and AMERICAN DADDY
It is natural, but when I returned home and openedthe door no one gave me a hug or a kiss.
I said"TADAIMA!" and my family said "OKAERINASAI". It is just a daily conversation, like "I am home!" and"Welcome home!" in Japanese.
As I have gotten used toliving in the USA, it wasn't enough. I envy Americanfamily life.
My father is old and traditional. He looks calm and reticent. I haven't had many experiences facing and talking with my father since Iwas a child. His dignified manner always makes me nervous.
Of course, he never kisses and hugs me. My American friend said "Try to give him a HUG and a KISS, and he might open his heart to you!" But I can't!!-It is impossible!
I have dreamed of having an AMERICAN DADDY, whom I can talk to as a friend.
I think my father is not good at expressing his feelings. I understand that my father loves me, so,maybe it does not make any difference between him and an American Daddy.
So I love my father.
I said"TADAIMA!" and my family said "OKAERINASAI". It is just a daily conversation, like "I am home!" and"Welcome home!" in Japanese.
As I have gotten used toliving in the USA, it wasn't enough. I envy Americanfamily life.
My father is old and traditional. He looks calm and reticent. I haven't had many experiences facing and talking with my father since Iwas a child. His dignified manner always makes me nervous.
Of course, he never kisses and hugs me. My American friend said "Try to give him a HUG and a KISS, and he might open his heart to you!" But I can't!!-It is impossible!
I have dreamed of having an AMERICAN DADDY, whom I can talk to as a friend.
I think my father is not good at expressing his feelings. I understand that my father loves me, so,maybe it does not make any difference between him and an American Daddy.
So I love my father.
July 05, 2005
Homecoming
I came back to Japan and am staying in TOKYO for a month during the summer vacation. The city, Tokyo, I saw after ten months is little changed. Some of the old shops and restaurants are gone and the new ones are built. However nothing is much changed. I felt the crowds, noise, and stress. The businessmen on the trains looked tired as usual. They look sicker than the patients in a hospital. I remembered that one ofthe reasons I decided to study in the USA is to escape from such stress, to find out what real life is, to search for who I am, and to know why I was born. I haven't found the answers yet, but I have been getting heal thier since I came to the USA. My life has been changed better and better because many American friends showed me how life is wonderful and how people deserve to enjoy life. My traditional Japanese tight mind was released from the strain. It is good for me.The only problem I had in the USA is gaining 10 pounds! I was shocked that I could not wear the clothes which I used to. Fortunately or unfortunately,I might be free from tightening both mentally and physically, as I must go on a diet now!
June 25, 2005
Ideal Future Spouse
My ideals for future husband are not too high.
It might be strange but he should feel comfortable enough to break wind in front of me, and he should accept me to break wind in front of him. As he should be the closest person in the world,
I should feel natural and safe and comfortable with him any time.
He should be passionate about me.
He should protect me at all times.
Usually, when a man member chooses a lady, he takes a look at her picture.
Of course, everyone has some standards for how the partner should look.
Since we interview each lady, I know many good ladies who have good personalities but they don't correspond with any man. Unfortunately, the profile pictures can not express her personality at all. So, men are more likely to choose the lady who is photogenic. That's certainly the case with women's side, also..
We have a proverb in Japan, that says "You will be getting bored with a beautiful wife in three days but you will be getting used to an ugly wife in three days."
Our ladies members are all charming, so please start to talking with them more, and try exploring to find their attractiveness and inner beauty.
It might be strange but he should feel comfortable enough to break wind in front of me, and he should accept me to break wind in front of him. As he should be the closest person in the world,
I should feel natural and safe and comfortable with him any time.
He should be passionate about me.
He should protect me at all times.
Usually, when a man member chooses a lady, he takes a look at her picture.
Of course, everyone has some standards for how the partner should look.
Since we interview each lady, I know many good ladies who have good personalities but they don't correspond with any man. Unfortunately, the profile pictures can not express her personality at all. So, men are more likely to choose the lady who is photogenic. That's certainly the case with women's side, also..
We have a proverb in Japan, that says "You will be getting bored with a beautiful wife in three days but you will be getting used to an ugly wife in three days."
Our ladies members are all charming, so please start to talking with them more, and try exploring to find their attractiveness and inner beauty.
June 19, 2005
F~ckn' Something
My English teacher always says "watch American TV andmovies." To learn the second language, you shouldexperience the real daily conversations in life. Sorecently, I tried watching DVD's instead of studyingwith boring text books. I learned the words like"F~ckn' something!" a lot in the movies I watched. Why do they say "F~ck' something!, F~cking something,F~ckin' something"??? As I listen to this word veryoften, I can guess that this phrase means somethingdirty. What I can not understand is how dirty or inwhat situation they are able it say and in whatsituation they must not. Likewise, I have alreadylearned words and phrases, but the importance is toknow how to use in daily life in the correctsituations. I have a Japanese friend, living inAmerica, whose family name is GOFUKU. This is anordinary Japanese name, but he usually hides hisfamily name and uses "David" in America. His daughterused to be teased when she was in school because ofthe family name. I told another American friend aboutthis then he says that he has a Japanese friend whosefamily name is MIFUKU. Incidentally, "FUKU" means"The Clothes" in Japanese, and GOFUKU means KIMONO. MIFUKU is a special KIMONO dress for royalty
June 10, 2005
BANZAI
Today, I went to my friend's sandwich shop to put upan advertisement for Kaiwa-USA. The owner of "What'sA SUB" is a Japanese American from Hawaii, and hiswife is Japanese. They look very happy running theirfamily business together.
I heard there are manyJapanese American gentlemen in Hawaii, and for them,it is pleasant to have a Japanese wife, and also,their parents are glad if their son has a Japanesewife. They say like "My son married to A REALJAPANESE!" (What is A REAL JAPANESE?)
I rememberedwhen I went to Hawaii to participate in our member'swedding ceremony last March, most of the guests wereJapanese American and Japanese from Japan. At theceremony, I was surprised that they looked Japanesebut they spoke English. I was also surprised that theysaid "BANZAI!" when they toasted. I heard that it wasa tradition in Japanese American in Hawaii's style ofcelebration. It was fun to say "BANZAI" at the weddingparty. I said "BANZAI! BANZAI! BANZAI!"
We don't usethe word "BANZAI" very often in these days, but it isone of the good words in Japanese. Written in Chinesecharacter, BANZAI means ten thousand years old. At the wedding ceremony, everybody hopes for long life and happiness.
I heard there are manyJapanese American gentlemen in Hawaii, and for them,it is pleasant to have a Japanese wife, and also,their parents are glad if their son has a Japanesewife. They say like "My son married to A REALJAPANESE!" (What is A REAL JAPANESE?)
I rememberedwhen I went to Hawaii to participate in our member'swedding ceremony last March, most of the guests wereJapanese American and Japanese from Japan. At theceremony, I was surprised that they looked Japanesebut they spoke English. I was also surprised that theysaid "BANZAI!" when they toasted. I heard that it wasa tradition in Japanese American in Hawaii's style ofcelebration. It was fun to say "BANZAI" at the weddingparty. I said "BANZAI! BANZAI! BANZAI!"
We don't usethe word "BANZAI" very often in these days, but it isone of the good words in Japanese. Written in Chinesecharacter, BANZAI means ten thousand years old. At the wedding ceremony, everybody hopes for long life and happiness.
May 30, 2005
My Birthday Resolution
It has been an entire year since I came to Las Vegas; I have recently turned 37 years old this month. Do women age 37 sound old? It is the average age of our women members, can you believe it? I decided to try something new, so I started this WEBLOG instead of “What’s New?” simply updated information from our Japan site mostly, my opinions, and experiences through my American life. , I would like you to share this BLOG, and write to me your wonderful stories and experiences with Japanese ladies. Today, one of my friends baked a birthday cake for me. He put 37 candles on the cake and I puffed out the candles I was very impressed because I have never had such a warm hearted birthday. I had never experienced a man bake a cake for me in Japan. he decorated it with my name in Chinese characters! WOW!) Can all American men bake a cake? It was more of a pleasant feeling than being given a expensive gift as they do in Japan. Thinking about my Birthday Resolution, I would also like to reach the goal that many of our members desire, as I enjoy supporting our member’s happiness, and also enjoy my American life.
May 24, 2005
Avocado and WASABI plus soy source
If you eat avocado with soy source and WASABI, it tastes like MAGURO (tuna). You could feel as if you were eating at a SUSHI restaurant. My friend taught me this way to eat avocado and I tried to tasting it. "Well, that's not bad!" Since then, I have always eaten avocado with soy source and WASABI. I taught some American friends about this, and they all liked it. Before then, they hadn't kept soy source and WASABI in their refrigerator. Soy source and WASABI collaborate with the different countries' food and create a new taste. I am proud of Japanese food culture, however, the price of WASABI in the US is very expensive. It costs about 3 dollars for just a small tube, whereas it is less than one dollar in Japan. Whenever my friends visit, from Japan, and ask if I'd like something from home, I say "WASABI please!"
May 19, 2005
NIKU JAGA
Have you ever had a chance to eat something cooked by a Japanese girl friend? If not, please request her to cook "NIKU JAGA". (I am sorry if you haven't found any Japanese girls who take care of you!)
"NIKU" JAGA is one of the traditional Japanese foods which a mother teaches her daughter, and the grandmother taught the mother, before that. It is Mom's home cooking. It is simple recipe with potatoes, carrots, and chopped beef, but it is important for her to inherit their original family tastes.
It is believed that if the wife can cook NIKU JAGA perfectly, the wife is accepted as a family member. So, cooking NIKU JAGA is the first examination for a Japanese lady after marriage.
"NIKU" JAGA is one of the traditional Japanese foods which a mother teaches her daughter, and the grandmother taught the mother, before that. It is Mom's home cooking. It is simple recipe with potatoes, carrots, and chopped beef, but it is important for her to inherit their original family tastes.
It is believed that if the wife can cook NIKU JAGA perfectly, the wife is accepted as a family member. So, cooking NIKU JAGA is the first examination for a Japanese lady after marriage.
April 25, 2005
Temporary Member
Yesterday, I telephoned a women who became a member recently. She is a student. Some men have already contacted her, but she said she is too busy to reply because she has to prepare for a test. I understand, but why has she tried to become a member now? I believe that she can keep a balance between studying and romance. But I told her not to be a member if she can't do it. Because some men are very serious for marriage, I don't want her to be rude. Likewise, there are some cases when men don't reply even though they are receiving emails. Of course, either can choose "Yes" or "No", but I would like both men and women to reply in a polite way even though they don't think it is a good match.
April 13, 2005
Is She Japanese?
"Look at her, she must be Japanese!"
My American friend often makes this guess when he sees Asian ladies.
I asked
"How do you know?"
He answers
"I know."
I ask again.
"But how???"
Although I am Japanese, I can not actually distinguish who is Japanese if there are some Asian ladies and they don't say anything in their native language. But he says he knows.
"Japanese ladies are different from the ladies of other Asian countries. It is not easily defined, but the facial expression, atmosphere, and fashion are different."
"Does it mean that most Japanese ladies have the same Louis Vuitton bags, and wear the same fashion with no with no individuality?"
" Sort of."
"Believe me, I am Japanese, but I have never had any Louis Vuitton bag!"
We continued talking while watching her cross the street. A car stopped to let her cross, she bowed the driver.
He said
"See, she must be Japanese!"
" Yes, I am sure."
We laughed.
My American friend often makes this guess when he sees Asian ladies.
I asked
"How do you know?"
He answers
"I know."
I ask again.
"But how???"
Although I am Japanese, I can not actually distinguish who is Japanese if there are some Asian ladies and they don't say anything in their native language. But he says he knows.
"Japanese ladies are different from the ladies of other Asian countries. It is not easily defined, but the facial expression, atmosphere, and fashion are different."
"Does it mean that most Japanese ladies have the same Louis Vuitton bags, and wear the same fashion with no with no individuality?"
" Sort of."
"Believe me, I am Japanese, but I have never had any Louis Vuitton bag!"
We continued talking while watching her cross the street. A car stopped to let her cross, she bowed the driver.
He said
"See, she must be Japanese!"
" Yes, I am sure."
We laughed.
April 08, 2005
Shako Jirei - Diplomatic Remarks
When you are invited with the words: "Come to my house." by Japanese, it is usually just a polite greeting. You don't have to check your schedule and plan accordingly.
Likewise, when American people say: "Talk to you soon." or "Talk to you later.", what does it really mean? Once, I didn't know "how soon it was" , so I was patiently awaiting the call. I had been waiting for about one hour for the call, which never came. I remembered feeling sad.
Likewise, when American people say: "Talk to you soon." or "Talk to you later.", what does it really mean? Once, I didn't know "how soon it was" , so I was patiently awaiting the call. I had been waiting for about one hour for the call, which never came. I remembered feeling sad.
Now, I know they're just words. I learned one more communication skill in America.
March 30, 2005
Drivers License
I have been in Las Vegas for more than six months; how time flies! At last, I got my driver’s license. Since I lived in a very central part of Tokyo, I didn’t have a car. In Tokyo, train runs every two minutes from morning to midnight. Besides, it costs about 300 to 500 dollars per month for parking, and 6 dollars per hour to park when you go shopping. You have to pay at least 7 dollars for driving on a highway (actually, there is no free way or highway because it is charged and you can not enjoy speed driving!) Also, you need to pay for insurance, tax, and the test to keep a car in a good condition every year. Actually, it takes more than 2000 dollars to get a driver’s. How expensive!Since I am an alien in the USA, it was a little difficult for me to get a driver’s license. When I took the written test, I asked the DMV if I could use an English-Japanese dictionary. However, they said I can’t. I protested that I had heard from some of my Japanese friend that they used a dictionary when they took a test. The exams are given in English and Spanish, so I appealed that it unfair. Then they said OK but I was told that I must ask them whenever I used the dictionary. So I asked “Excuse me sir, may I use the dictionary?” at least 50 times! Now have a NEVADA DRIVER’S LICENSE. I am used to driving now. I drove for 350 miles to San Diego by my self, last week. It is incredible that I enjoy driving on the freeway with my favorite music playing. I feel a little more independent and freedom in the USA.
March 17, 2005
Football - From My Japanese Friend Who Has an American Husband
National Football League (NFL) season is usually from September to January. They play Sundays and Mondays but don’t underestimate those games, for some unknown reason, men love sitting in front of their HD TVs with beers and chips. In fact, many men take “watching” football as their full time job during the football season.My husband is not an exception. He knows everything about the teams and the players. He religiously keeps track of all information known to man. To make things more convenient, we live in Las Vegas. During the football season, my husband and his buddies can be found at a Sports Book (sports betting area in a casino) all day on Sunday. They gather early so they can secure good seating and discuss on which games to bet on. Monday nights, my husband situates himself in front of the TV with his soda (no drinking during weekdays in our house) and watches the pre-game show, the game itself, and then the after-game show. During this ritual, the house is filled with yelling at the TV. It’s a miracle that the TV’s never been broken. This goes on for approximately five hours. In case your future husband is like mine, just keep this in mind. As long as your husband’s watching football, you know where your husband is. He’s not flirting with women, he’s not drinking and he’s not doing anything illegal. Don’t go crazy and ban the football experience from him. All it takes is a little bit of effort to learn the rules of football and watch it with him. I think all husbands like that. Mine does for sure. If it makes my husband happy for several months, I can live with it. My husband comes back to earth after the football season. He again becomes the outgoing, sociable, funny guy that I married. We do a lot of things together during the off-season such as hiking, skiing, and traveling. The group Chicago once sang that “even lovers need a time away”. The months of September through January are our time away from each other. Thus, life is good.
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