July 31, 2005

JAPANESE CHICHI (father) and AMERICAN DADDY

It is natural, but when I returned home and openedthe door no one gave me a hug or a kiss.
I said"TADAIMA!" and my family said "OKAERINASAI". It is just a daily conversation, like "I am home!" and"Welcome home!" in Japanese.
As I have gotten used toliving in the USA, it wasn't enough. I envy Americanfamily life.

My father is old and traditional. He looks calm and reticent. I haven't had many experiences facing and talking with my father since Iwas a child. His dignified manner always makes me nervous.
Of course, he never kisses and hugs me. My American friend said "Try to give him a HUG and a KISS, and he might open his heart to you!" But I can't!!-It is impossible!

I have dreamed of having an AMERICAN DADDY, whom I can talk to as a friend.

I think my father is not good at expressing his feelings. I understand that my father loves me, so,maybe it does not make any difference between him and an American Daddy.

So I love my father.

July 05, 2005

Homecoming

I came back to Japan and am staying in TOKYO for a month during the summer vacation. The city, Tokyo, I saw after ten months is little changed. Some of the old shops and restaurants are gone and the new ones are built. However nothing is much changed. I felt the crowds, noise, and stress. The businessmen on the trains looked tired as usual. They look sicker than the patients in a hospital. I remembered that one ofthe reasons I decided to study in the USA is to escape from such stress, to find out what real life is, to search for who I am, and to know why I was born. I haven't found the answers yet, but I have been getting heal thier since I came to the USA. My life has been changed better and better because many American friends showed me how life is wonderful and how people deserve to enjoy life. My traditional Japanese tight mind was released from the strain. It is good for me.The only problem I had in the USA is gaining 10 pounds! I was shocked that I could not wear the clothes which I used to. Fortunately or unfortunately,I might be free from tightening both mentally and physically, as I must go on a diet now!

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